Monday, September 26, 2016

26 September 2016 (Monday)

Slept badly last night. Woke up at 2:15 and didn't get back to sleep until probably 3:30. Felt cruddy and in a bad mood all day. Had a darn good workout though, after a somewhat slow start. As I said earlier, realizing that part of why I'm doing it is kind of useless is actually helping.

Went downtown. Sharon was in which was good because we got some stuff squared away. I spent most of the morning getting Engi's data ready, which was difficult because I found a bug and it took a while to figure out how to fix it. And SPSS is a piece of s**t. I found out that using it to Save As a dataset containing 914 records to Excel means it will save only 845 records. Without an error message or anything. That's one of its less important bugs, btw.

Anyway, I did get quite a bit done. Ride home was uneventful. I did start getting. . . .I dunno. Emotions close to the edge, later in the afternoon. Broke down once I got home.

It's a bit embarrassing, I guess. But the issues all this has brought to the fore are. . .well, serious ones, at least in terms of one's general well being. They are things that, looking back on my old school report cards and such, I've dealt with most of my life. Things I've kind of known are flaws but never really addressed. When I should have addressed them as a young man, I got bitter and resentful instead. Sometimes you have to be knocked in the head good and hard to make changes. I got knocked good and hard.

Going to Orcas tomorrow. May not have an entry although I'll try to do it while waiting for the ferry instead. 

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