Sunday, July 31, 2016

31 July 2016 (Sunday)

On this day in 1954 (Saturday):
Slept in a little late this morning. Worked on some rocks and then had dinner at Grandma's. I [gain] Louise [ran sooy] from home today. Dad and I looked at some used cars and drove down to Toppenish and saw a good show. Worked at the church tonight and dad took me out to Playland $1.00. Eats today $1.30. He picked me up about mid-night. Got home and got to bed about 12:30. $1.00. Monthly spents[sic] $30.64 Spent $102.30. TOTAL SPENDING FROM JAN $311.72.
Another day, more melancholy. Which is good. I had positive feedback from That Which Will Remain Nameless but it's stayed around. Perhaps this is more than what it used to be, which was largely directed at one person. Would be nice.

Had to have assistance twice last night, the second time because -- wonder of wonders -- I woke up at 3:30. 3:15 actually, but close enough. Ended up sleeping until almost 5 which was pretty much ideal. Because of that I went to Mass. And didn't even close my eyes! Fr. Basso was there and he had an interesting portion of the homily. He was talking about greed and mentioned that it wasn't just to do with money or material things, that one could be greedy about, for example, attention. I hadn't thought of it that way exactly, although I had been inching towards something like that. I had considered it in relation to my workouts, which for years I've always directed at (in a sense; the way it looks is about 4th in line for the reasons I do it) the way I looked from it, that I should be aiming for as much of a bodybuilder look as I can (which isn't really much to be honest). But lately I've been rethinking that, directing my workouts more towards. . . .I don't know what. Being strong and injury free and guiding things toward increased functionality I guess. It sounds weird and perhaps a bit trite, but there you have it.

Anyway, enough wool gathering. After Mass I didn't do much, although I did end up taking a short nap. We ate at McD's and then did the usual shopping thing. The afternoon ground away slowly. I had been debating whether to practice my trumpet or not and ended up hitting the guitar again. That went surprisingly well. I just practiced basic chord switching -- D-C-G -- but concentrated on doing each one well. Actually was doing them with good facility.

'Sheila' the squirrel came up on the back deck roof for some chow. She's been taking nuts out of my hand lately. She's very gentle about it although the first time she kinda grabbed my finger with her claws, which didn't hurt but it was a bit uncomfortable. Now she gently just takes it with her teeth. Sweet little thing, although she does tend to like to chase off the others.

Usual walk.

So, another melancholy day and productive. I shouldn't say this, but most of the anxiety is gone. Banished by the sadness, I guess. And remember, I say 'sadness' but it's a good sort. Whatever. It is gone and it is good. 

Saturday, July 30, 2016

30 July 2016 (Saturday)

[EDIT] This one somehow never got published.

On this day in 1954 (Friday):
Got up and had breakfast early this morning. Ray and I went fishing this morning. Took my Plymouth. This afternoon we went up in the [casen walking] for [rocks]. Also did some work on my rocks. Went to the [skising] about 7:45 $.50. Louise [disled] the [wanted] her working [dots on soft 15] today if it is [passimble]. Walked around a little tonight. Got in about 1:00 this morning. Gas $1.00 Spent $1.50.
Man, he wrote badly today. I mean that day. Back then.

I had a decent enough day. Slept well, although once I got out of the bed I had some difficulty getting back to sleep. But I slept until almost 5 which is good. Sat around until 7 when the Spousal Unit arose. Made breakfast in. I did some cleaning up from the contractors, mostly doing the floors and putting stuff away. Had to go get a mocha because my stomach felt bad after breakfast. I drove up to get it just because. Came back and washed the Honda. Sat around and watched part of a movie and then we drove up to North Bend.

AND ON THE WAY BACK WE SAW A BLACK BEAR. He ran across 202 and, fortunately, the person in front of us saw him/her/it and stopped. Poor thing, it was kinda young and ran across and then started to run back the other way and then ran over and disappeared into the brush. Yay! First time I've ever seen one in the wild. Glad he/she/it was safe.

Anyway, drove back and stopped at DQ for a blizzard and then went home. The new glass for the old clock was here so we put that in. It was a tiny bit too large so I used the Dremel to grind down a notch and fit it in that way. Then I cleaned off the top shelf in my room and put it up there surrounded by other old family memorabilia, as well as Michele's family photo. I like it. It's a decent mantle clock, kind of a loud one but I like the sound of a ticking clock. It's very calming. Reminds me of quiet days at grandma's. Except I would have been monumentally bored.

Went to NGate to walk as I was searching for my college football magazine, but they didn't have it. Darn it.

Still good an melancholy most of the day, especially this morning. 

Friday, July 29, 2016

29 July 2016 (Friday)

On this day in 1954 (Thursday):
Started painting again this morning. Painted until noon. Lola and Ray came over this morning. Louise came down to the house a couple of times today. Ray and I polished rocks all afternoon today. After supper [Elmer] picked us up and I played for a U.S.O. dance at the Y.M.C.A. We played [eatseade] tonight. Ray and Lola came down and heard the band for a while. Rode home with them. Spent $.10. 
You know, I would like to play for a band. Nothing fancy, but that would be fun. Just to play once a month or so for a dance or something like that.

Political agitation update: They removed all of the No Parking signs. I will not declare total victory until they take down the Speed Bumps signs though.

I am melancholy tonight. Just for reasons that I shall not share. But started mid-afternoon.

I slept okay again last night, again without assistance. Workout was decent. Well, no, it was really good. Chatted a bit with the Ebony chick who seems to be very nice, if somewhat underdressed. Well, not really, but not exactly demurely either. Rode home. Ate bagels. Waited around for contractors who didn't show up until almost 10 or so. I finished the one report and did a couple of other things for there, and then left a couple notes for Sharon over in Kenya. She's coming back next week. I will be happy to see her, we worked well together even from a distance. Very nice and very capable and Michael thinks we have the same somewhat edgy sense of humor. The contractors finished everything up around 1 so that was good. Was able to turn on the furnace fan although I'm not sure it helps all that much. Very quiet.

I went to the UVil SBux but it wasn't all that great, partly for the melancholy reasons stated above (or rather not stated but alluded to), and maybe it's just not my thing anymore. I dunno. It was a nice break though. I got a couple things at the QFC down there for dinner though. Came home and did some cleaning up and played my trumpet for a little while. It was enjoyable. I was going through the Magic Trumpet. Maybe that will be my first song I will set out to play perfectly. Fairly simple, but there is a lot of styling that needs to be done. Then I'll work on Tangerine.

Made dinner, mostly on the grill as it was 89 today. Walked. Listening to the same sad piano music I used to listen to when I first moved out here, Michael Jones' Seascapes. As I said earlier (couple days ago maybe), this is not the anxiety sort of melancholy feeling, it's good in a way. Useful. A quiet, calm sort of sadness where I don't mind not doing much except working. So in that sense, useful. And it doesn't make me nervous, anxious, etc. I would like to keep it in some capacity for a while. 

Thursday, July 28, 2016

28 July 2016 (Thursday)

On this day in 1954 (Wednesday):
Started painting again on the house. Saw Louise about 10:30 this morning down at our meeting place at the school. Got myself some dinner and then went [sevisioning] $.25. Met Louise down at the pool after supper at Grandma's. I rode the bus home with Louise after she got off from work. Painted some more on the house when I got home. Getting to bed about 12:30. Spent $.25. 
Sneaking out for secret meetings by the school, eh?

Yay for me, I slept through the night unassisted. Felt really good for a change. I actually slept pretty well even though it was kind of warm. Had a decent enough workout, but my left knee is still being grumpy. Still don't know what to do with it. Stretching it out seems to help. Some. Ride there and back was uneventful.

Attic guys showed up around 8:30? Don't remember when. I got a call from the supervisor saying they were there but no one was home. I don't think they rang or knocked or anything. They worked up there until a little before noon. The furnace guys snuck in when I wasn't looking and they worked until almost 4:30. Almost in, but it needs the thermostat and some other bits and pieces and an inspection. It's a little bigger than I thought it would be. But not too bad. I worked pretty steadily most of the day and got the Coptic stuff done and out. Was a bit more work than I'd thought, but I think I got it right. I checked it enough times. . . . .Also finished a report for Cascadia and sent out two bids. Will probably go to Gig Harbor for some minor monitoring next Wednesday.

I went to UVil for lunch because I was sick of McD's. Rather pleasant sitting outside and eating. I didn't spend much time there though. I really worked until about 1:30 and then started looking for other things to do. Need to do some cleaning downstairs and we will have to get a new floor for that room. I'd like to do something nice down there. Maybe vinyl.

I fiddled with the guitar for a while but it wasn't going well. I dunno, just not very accurate today. I should play my trumpet more. So I dunno. Okay day I guess. 87. 

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

27 July 2016 (Wednesday)

On this day in 1954 (Tuesday):
Got up early this this morning and started painting the house. Took the bus up to meet Louise from work [out spoon] again today. Painted most of the afternoon. Talked to her on the telephone for a while. Carl came down tonight and we went by and I got to be with Louise for a little while tonight. Had some before I went to bed tonight. Getting to be about 12:00. Eats $.40. Spent $.40. 
I had a really good day today. Oddly enough. Sure didn't start out all that great, as in, at 3:45 this morning harumph. So, felt kinda crappy all day because of that. Still, I had a really decent workout and had a nice chat with Hannah at the gym who is from Wisconsin and is leaving for eastern WA at the end of the week, and also the hot little asian chick that is down there often. Well, I mean, she's very nice; I like her. Works really hard, too, and it shows. I also asked Stewart "Hey, didn't you used to work out here?" Heh. He's been out a lot. I also decided I am playing Injury Whack-a-Mole: I fix one thing and another thing pops up. Sheesh.

Ride down and back was okay. I worked on the one report all morning and treated myself to a mocha, walking up to the SBux around 9. The inspector called up at 11 and said he'd be there within an hour and so I decided around 11:30 to get some lunch from McD's (hadn't planned to, but there's nothing in the house and I had to get something) and, lo and behold, all of the (^$(#^*&($#* SDOT No Parking signs had been moved. Ha. I would hope my little sign caused a backlash, but they're probably just showing their usual incompetence and are just putting it off. Jerks. I made a new sign though:


So there, talked to nice young ladies at the gym and at least the )$@&(%^$*)@^ speed humps are put off for a while. I did some more work after lunch and then decided I needed some sun so I laid out in the back yard for about an hour. Felt good to just get more sun. Worked a bit more after that and then started dinnering. We went up to the Fred Meyer on Lake City Way so I could possibly get a new pitcher for my iced tea maker (nix), fishing line to fix the one flamingo chimes, some fruity fizzy drink things that I took a liking to in Wisconsin, and some milk.

Oh, the guys took out the old furnace, too. I don't miss it. It's a little sad that the original furnace from the house is gone, but I don't care.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

26 July 2016 (Tuesday)

On this day in 1954 (Monday):
Got up early this morning and started painting on the house. At 10:00 I caught the bus and rode up to where Louise is working and rode home with her. Painted on the house all afternoon. Saw Louise down town this evening and got to [bed] with her for a couple of hours. Walked home and I had a bite to eat before I got off the [bed]. Am getting to bed about 12:00 tonight. 
Busy and productive day today. I slept. . .well, meh. Had trouble getting to sleep (minor assistance) and then -- would you believe? -- woke up at 3:30. But I managed to get back to sleep with minor assistance. Sheesh. I rode to the IMA and learned that those ASSHATS are putting in grooved speed bumps so the $(*&$((*$^@ bikes can just cruise down as fast as they want. Bastards. So I rode back up on 40th. Suck it, SDOT.

And when I got home I put my signs up:

So far of four people who have mentioned it they've all been positive. Suck it, SDOT.

No, I'm not annoyed at all. . . . .

I worked on Coptic stuff most of the day. The contractors got here around 10 and finished up around 2. I had to rerun some of the big programs because it turned out I didn't have a Gender variable! How can that possibly be left out? Note to self: Check Engi's old code for variables as well. I went to McD's and brought it back for the Spousal Unit who was at home again today. When I got done (read: sick of doing) the Coptic stuff, I fiddled around for a while and then started on the latest report for Cascadia. Problematic because no one took good notes so I have to make up a lot of stuff. Also had to deal with DAHP blehh. So, some guy did a small survey on this property in 1999 and found stuff. It is virtually guaranteed that DAHP will require monitoring. Because that guy found stuff. So I suggested that we just monitor this work because it will be shallower than the stuff he found and doing a survey would just be added cost and work. Well, no, they want a survey. I don't think it ever occurred to her that doing a survey if monitoring was a near certainty would be idiotic. Well, that's DAHP.

So, made dinner (chicken in the crock pot) etc., and then walked. We chatted with the neighbors about my sign, chatted a bit with Norma, and then the Spousal Unit walked a couple of blocks and then turned back and I continued. Nice walk.


Monday, July 25, 2016

25 July 2016 (Monday)

On this day in 1954 (Sunday):
Got up this morning about 11:00 when Louise called me up from the church. I didn't go to Grandma's this morning for anything to eat. I got dinner myself. Went to the show with Louise today. Went to the Yakima $.55. Also went to Louise's church tonight by myself. Got a ride home with [Bayugh] and Nancy. Saw Louise a little while tonight. Getting to bed about 12:10. Spent $.55. 
I'm not really sure that's all "Louise" up there but it makes sense.

I slept quite well last night, oddly enough. Oddly because it was kind of warm. Ended up sleeping until the alarm went off and not on the floor! Probably because I'd vacuumed it yesterday. Anyway, it still amazes me how much a good rest does for one's mood.

The Spousal Unit felt very ill this morning and so didn't go to work. I rode my bike to the IMA and had a really quite good workout. Worked most of the morning on the one report and another scope of work, although the latter ended up being a bit more complicated and looks like we may only monitor. What else. . . .the gas guys came in around 9:30 and they worked until almost 3. Made lots of noise. DIdn't quite finish it up. More tomorrow. I went to McD's for lunch and brought back an Egg McMuffin for the Spousal Unit. Worked until around 2 and then started to do various things. I got the burned plastic junk off the stove by soaking it in vinegar and then scraping with a razor blade; worked easily. Got that off the Interwebs.

I made leftovers for dinner for me and oatmeal for the Spousal Unit. I walked up to UVil to get bagels afterwards. Nice walk, but very warm (85 today). Some young chick in the QFC was wearing a pink bikini with only a flimsy throw over it, which I thought was probably not appropriate garb for a grocery store but I think she was getting a fair amount of attention for it, and that was undoubtedly the point. 

Sunday, July 24, 2016

24 July 2016 (Sunday)

On this day in 1954 (Saturday):
Got up at 5:30 this morning and went fishing with Lee Roy. Got back here about 1:00. Saw Louise up by the school for an hour or so this afternoon. Got some pictures for her $.65. Left for Moses Lake with the dance band at about 6:00 this evening. Played U.S.O. dance at the Air base there. On the way back we stopped and had some eats $.50. We got back into Yakima about xx:00 this morning. Gas $.50. Pop $.20. Spent $1.35.
Well, this morning started off bright and early at 3:45. Ugh. Slept pretty okay most of the night. I tried to get back to sleep twice before the Spousal Unit got up but no go. *sigh* Just hung out and watched the Hungarian Grand Prix, another boring race where the guy (Hamilton) led on the first lap and was never threatened since. Ate in. I read outside on the front steps for a little while and then came in a took a short, but welcome, nap. Got quite a bit done after that, chores-wise. Then sat down to watch TV for a while (mostly pre-NASCAR junk) and almost fell asleep again. Went to UVil, did the usual stuff. Came home early because the Spousal Unit's guts were in bad shape. I went out back and sat out in the sun for a while. I listened to an old Suzanne Vega album which, if one knew me, one would wonder why the heck I would even have it, let alone listen to it semi-regularly. I liked it in the later 1980s, specifically 1987-88. I have good memories of that time, a summer of which was spent on San Juan Island at a field school and then in Egypt the first time. I've probably mentioned how the one song, Calypso, really capture my imagination the few times I stayed in Alexandria at a hotel with big floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the Mediterranean. I loved that. Lots of nostalgia associated with interesting archaeology, good work, not to mention a hot little undergrad. Heh.

Anyway.

Made dinner and then walked. Nice day out, around 81 and sunny. This coming week we're supposed to have our first days over 85 in July. We had a few very warm days in May and June but since then it's been a fairly typical, cool summer. 

Saturday, July 23, 2016

23 July 2016 (Saturday)

On this day in 1954 (Friday):
Got up early this morning. After breakfast I took a [tire] apart for dad. We had some insulation put in a part of the house today. Went fishing with Les this afternoon. Got a fishing license $2.65. Went to the American Legion basket game[sic] tonight. $.60. Walked around some after the game and saw Louise tonight. Am tired tonight. Got in the house about 1:15 this morning. Spent $3.25.
I managed to sleep until 5 this morning although I don't know how. We went out for breakfast, which was good; first bacon in like a month! I cleaned and put stuff away when we got back, mostly the junk I had shipped back along with the boxes. Just put away stuff to make the place a little neater for when the contractors come this week. Plus I'll be working here M-W so I'd like it to be a little neater.

Ended up watching another Bond movie (Moonraker, dumb one) and took a nap. We went to the BBQ place on Lake City for lunch and then. . . .Spam's Club. Got ink so I can make my signs for Monday. Piss, off SDOT. Did an estate sale, wow. Apparently it was a renter and a total hoarder. One room was still packed with so much stuff you couldn't get into it. Bought nothing but it was kind of fun looking through all the junk. Crazy person.

Thence to UVil for some yogurt and a few comestibles. Didn't do much when I got home, although I made dinner and then managed to turn on the wrong burner and melted some hotpads to the one and am still trying to get it off. D-U-M dum.

Walked up at NGate and got some other junk, too.

I am lately getting certain pangs of. . . .I dunno. Not the sort of anxiety pangs I used to get, the sort of hopelessness feelings. Now just some sadness like I used to get when I first moved out here. I don't really count that as a negative; in all honesty, that sort of thing acts more like a fire in the belly. 

Friday, July 22, 2016

22 July 2016 (Friday)

On this day in 1954 (Thursday):
After dinner this morning[sic] I went to work on the house again. Also I worked on some [rocks] this morning. Worked all afternoon cleaning up my Plymouth. Washed and polished it. Talked to Louise a couple of time today on the phone. After supper at Grandma's I came home and got cleaned up and played down at the Y.M.C.A. Got in about 1:00 this morning. 
Odd day today. I slept. . .well, okay had trouble going to sleep, needed assistance. Then I woke up at -- you guessed it -- 3:30 and had some minor assistance then, too. WHEN WILL I STOP. Workout went quite well, I really pushed it. It was raining so I had the Spousal Unit drop me off and then bussed it home. Did the usual bagel thang and then went to Cascadia. I did Meg's mapping stuff most of the time and also did a new project bid for a nice lady who was doing something on Whidbey. I also made a PDF copy of an old ethnographic work that I use a lot but we only had one copy of so I can use it wherever I am. Left there about 11:45. Went to McD's here but it was slow traffic for some reason. I had to come home and get my Alaska card so I could pay the contractors for Monday. Then I tried to get a sign printed -- my anti-SDOT sign -- but it was a pain in the ass. I figured I could just print it out and slap it on a board, but the lady was just offering hundreds of suggestions and junk and I started to wonder if she didn't like my message -- GO AWAY SDOT -- and just wanted to make it difficult. Hmmmm. Well, then I went to UVil and had a nice visit with Fiona at the SBux. Came home, futzed around, ordered a pizza for dinner, and made an awful salad. I started to watch a movie called Paper Towns which was basically a teen "coming of age" movie, which was kind of dumb, but I had to finish it. Meh. I suppose a teenager might find it very exciting and stuff. Walked the NGate.

I watched much of an old Bond movie last night, For Your Eyes Only, which was okay, although it had my favorite Bond Girl Carole Bouquet in it. But it was 1981 and I found myself really wishing I could go back to that year and start over. It seemed like a good place to re-start: I would have been in my first-second years of college and still had time to go in whatever direction I wanted to. What would I do? I'm not sure. I have thought about this before and not come to any firm conclusions. I definitely would keep in touch with Michele and the rest of my family; that is a given. I wasted so much time being away from all of them.

How I wish I could go back. . . . .

Thursday, July 21, 2016

21 July 2016 (Thursday)

On this day in 1954 (Wednesday):
Got up early this morning. Couldn't get much done last night. [Mason] this [down] first thing this morning. Meet Louise at [Joudone George Stars]. I had the dodge. We sat behind the store and talked. We decided a wedding [!!!!] date there this morning. Dec. 19. Seems like a long time from now. [Scraped] on this house a most of the afternoon. Talked to Louise on the phone for about and[sic] hour this evening. Did some [rock] work tonight. 
I think they elope or something at the end of September or something.

So today I am planning on getting political for the first time. I'm going to make up a yard sign that says GO AWAY SDOT and put it on the terrace. They're putting in the f***ing speed bumps next week. I would have printed little ones out to hang on the no parking signs but the ($_(b (_*&$@($) _(*$^@(*^@ printer won't print plain black without. . . .blue ink. Seriously. Like I have said often, computers and technology are just plain getting worse, not better. They do more stuff, but they do the basics awfully.

Anyway. I woke up at 3:30 AGAIN but went back to sleep with minor assistance. Workout was okay, although my left knee is starting to hurt again so I don't know what to do. Went downtown and actually got quite a bit done. Met Lisa for lunch and had California rolls. Weren't as good as I remember them being and ended up not filling me up at all; I had to eat a protein bar like an hour later. So, meh, no sushi for me for a few years again, probably. But it was nice seeing her again. What else. Went back up to NJB and worked again and basically got the mortality date set. But then I saw Engi and she now wants it from 2005 on instead of 2011. So, I have to do some more.

Ride home was uneventful. Last box got here okay. The Budweiser light is up and looks nice. I need to see if I can flip it around though. Went to UVil for some foodstuffs. Was looking into making a yard sign but it's kinda pricey. Might be worth it though. Assholes. 

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

20 July 2016 (Wednesday)

On this day in 1954 (Tuesday):
Got up at Ray's place about 10:00. Watched T.V. until noon. Lee Roy came in little after lunch and we left about 1:30. Got home about 5:00. Borrowed Lee's car tonight and saw Louise at a party. Took her home. Got home about 10:30. Didn't get ready for bed until about 12:45. Louise made my [sare of city outed] tonight. Mainly it's just the way I feel. 
Man, I wish I knew what he was saying there, it sounded like feeeeeelings.

Busy day today. Slept okay UNTIL A LITTLE BEFORE 4 WHEN JACK DECIDED HE NEEDED TO TELL ME THAT HE WAS TAKING THE STICK OUT OF THE TV ROOM. Meh, at least I slept mostly through the night.

Rode the bike to the gym and had a decent enough workout. Rode back, did a little work while I ate my bagel, and then went to Cascadia. Worked there until about 11:45 and then went to McD's and came home to await the furnace guy. He called about 1:30 and asked if he could be late (until 3) and that was fine, so I went to the UVil to cash my check and sit in the SBux for a few. Also got some dinner stuff. Came home and awaited the furnace guy some more and he didn't get here until about 3:45. I practiced the guitar while I waited and futzed with Fat Bottomed Girls which I was cranking while driving through the UVil parking garage, heh.

Looks like they will do the work M-W next week so I will be at home all three days. Made dinner, walked.

Oh, the one box came today and the clock's glass was smashed. Man, that's two boxes I've sent that were smooshed and glass broke. I guess I can get a new one for like <$10 though. I looked it up and it's not a bad clock, probably worth about $150-250. It was Seth Thomas' cheaper middle-class brand in the 1930s (Plymouth Z 23 B). Good, but not a great clock. The other items came through fine. The one chime (flamingos) needs fixing though, the strings (fishing line) is all brittle and one broke every time I tried to tie it. 

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

19 July 2016 (Tuesday)

On this day in 1954 (Monday):
Slept in until about [10:00] this morning[see bing] at Ray's. After we [atc] Rays and I went down town. I bought some Tix [oxide] for my rock [part fit] $6.00. Just sat around and helped Ray [sun] the rest of the day. Watched some good Television program this evening. Sure was cold over here again today. Got to bed about 1:00. Thought a lot about L. today. Spent $6.00. 
A little catching up from last night. After writing the entry for yesterday I took the folder of my stuff that I brought back from mom's. Wow. She kept a lot of stuff. Most of my old report cards and teacher's reports. As I clearly remember, I was an awful student. Lots of C's and D's and a few F's. Many of the comments were also what I remembered: I would not settle down, was easily distracted, didn't concentrate on the task at hand, etc. They also said I could do really well if I wanted to, was smart, but just didn't apply myself.

I will say one teacher's comments struck me like a slap in the face: My old 6th grade teacher Mrs. [Barbara] Strand: “Tony is not being fair to himself”. She had me pegged. She probably had the most perceptive comments overall as well. Thanks, Mrs. Strand. I doubt you're still alive, but you have affected me lo these many years later. Sent me into yet another melancholy mood. I'm not sure what to think about all of that. In a way, I remembered it all and wasn't surprised by any of the comments. However, looking back at it. . . .who would have thought that such a dorkwad kid who couldn't concentrate in school would end up with a PhD? I really kind of wonder if I even got the dumb thing just to make up for all of that. Kind of humbling in a way. If I'd been that same kind now there is no doubt in my mind that I would be on ritalin or something and been diagnosed with ADD.

I slept okay last night. Actually quite well. Workout was so-so; leg day and I'm still not sure what I should be doing. My knee did okay though. Went to work downtown and SPSS is being psychotic again. Now it is storing some dates as Oct 4 1852 -- the start date it used to calculate dates -- but it doesn't display that; it displays nothing. But if I test for the date being Missing, it fails because there's something in it. But I can't figure out what sort of code to use to identify when it was whatever value in it. I think I'll end up exporting it, changing all of those things manually, and then importing it back in.

Otherwise, mostly an uneventful day. Still in a melancholy way, which I for one would like to stay that way. It's very calming and I can, you know, concentrate on the task at hand. Perhaps once the reminders from Wisconsin come today and tomorrow I can manage to hold onto this a little longer.

One thing: I found the old receipt for my trumpet. I think it was in May of 1979 for $442. I didn't think it was that much. But I'm pretty sure I kicked in some for it. I thought I had it for more than a year though. I graduated in 1980 so I was only playing it for that senior year. I came home and played for a while this afternoon. Really, I didn't lose much from the last time I picked it up. I do enjoy playing it. It's so nice to know what I'm doing! Maybe I should keep it up since it cost so much. . . .

Monday, July 18, 2016

18 July 2016 (Monday)

On this day in 1954 (Sunday):
Still over here at Ray and Lola's. Slept in late this morning. Mowed the lawn around their place for Ray today. Read some and watched Television tonight a bit. Walked around some before going to bed tonight. Sure is cold over here. Got to bed about 12:30. Thought about Louise all day today. Wish I could be with her. 
Lovesick dweeb.

I should talk.

Had a truly massive anxiety attack (or whatever) last night. I don't know what really set it off, although I had a thought about Michele and that I had come to annoy her or something and that just sent me off into a complete mess. Was entirely dispirited on myself. Mainly. . well, I'm not sure. I was desperate to completely revamp my whole. . .self. Behavior. Thought processes. Everything. Tough.

But I actually did something about it today and was busy and productive the whole day. I had a decent enough workout and then went to the skin doctor appt., and got a clean bill on that count. I hope the guy is good because he spent all of 10 minutes looking me over. Either that or I really have nothing worth being concerned about. Anyway, check one: next up is the EKG to make sure I don't have any underlying atrial fib like mom. Michele and I were talking about that and I guess she had had one done. Apparently, you wear a monitor for 48 hours and it tracks your rhythms.

I went to Cascadia and worked on a report for a while, and then we were figuring out what to do about some fieldwork for this week -- Mike is ill and couldn't make tomorrow -- so I was getting ready to go, but we got Chris to go out Wednesday. So it will all work out. Went for lunch at NGate because. . . .well, I don't remember why. But I did. Then went to Cascadia to get a screen and tarp (this was before we knew what was what) and then came home.

I then proceeded to scrape the deck. . . .errr, fence. Thing. Took about an hour? Maybe longer. One bottom piece came off. I decided to paint it once more and then replace it all. I was thinking something like some form of treated wood? I dunno. Maybe something white and plastic that still looks nice. Anyway that was part of my Just Work routine, instead of going to UVil SBux and wasting time.

What else. Made dinner and then walked.

So, still kind of a melancholy feel about me but retaining a good attitude. A good Wisconsin attitude. 

Sunday, July 17, 2016

17 July 2016 (Sunday)

On this day in 1954 (Saturday):
Slept in lately[sic] again this morning over here at [Ags]. Helped Ray in his apartment again this morning. Spent most of the afternoon looking out [trailing-house]. I went to town this evening and walked around some. $1.00. Had some eats when I got back to Roy's. Got to bed tonight about 12:30. Wish Louise would be with me. Spent $1.00. 
I looked back a couple of entries but couldn't find out where he was. The last two entries also contained a bit about Louise at the end. And here when all this started I thought he'd end up with that stupid Barbara.

Well, first full day back and it's been a roller coaster. Kinda didn't sleep all that well last night. I woke up at, yes, 3:30 AGAIN. I took a little sliver of an ambien but it didn't work so I had another small sliver and then I was out until a little after 5. So I was at least well rested for today. I kind of felt pretty comfortable most of the day, I guess. Was sad to be Not In Wisconsin but okay. Portions of the day, including the time we were out walking this evening, I was hating being here. Like I really don't belong. In some ways, I think I want to go back to my early graduate school days when I was just out here to do that and then leave. A thought that ran through my head yesterday was "I just want to work", meaning just forget everything and (as in grad school) just work on that. It's very comforting in a way, although I think perhaps not good for one's sociability. As I've said, it makes something of a refuge for anxiety. Speaking of which, I was reading Neil Peart's book Ghost Rider on the plane and came across this passage that he had written as a journal entry:
“Notice in these “watches of the night,” or while riding (or anytime), pattern of torment (tormente, Spanish for storm). Not only have to relive and examine every episode of life with Jackie and Selena, but every single episode of my own life. Every embarrassment, act of foolishness, wrong-headedness, error, idiocy etc. going back to childhood and all the way forward to now.
I physically flinch, say “ow” out loud, or “fuck,” as the case may be, and can hardly bear it. Such stupid things sometimes, but it seems my confidence, or belief in myself, or something, is so shaken, so undermined, so tenuous, that I have no tolerance, no understanding, no forgiveness: for myself or anyone else. No forgiveness . . .”
That's exactly what I went through daily for several years and still do many nights. It's what my brother described as 'the night demons'. Perhaps it really is a middle-aged thing.

So here I sit, once again back from Wisconsin where I was comfortable and (mostly) calm and confident and The Old Me. And once again I wonder how I might retain this mood or this feeling or whatever. In the past, it's lasted for a few days and then the daily routine of being here works its way back into my psyche and I go back to the old ways. How can I hold onto that? How can I maintain that mood? How to I keep that "confidence, or belief in myself, or something"? It certainly is tempting, as I noted above, to sink into that single-minded work-only sort of routine, as productive and, in its own way, rewarding as it is. To really pour my whole self into something outside of myself. That's not really a good way to live, unless you're a young man with time and a goal.

I'll try to surround myself with reminders of home and to look at them daily and remind myself where I am from. I've already gotten quite a few objects from those days around the house, but I have neglected looking at them. Or perhaps the present just overwhelms them. Perhaps I can manage to walk a line between work fixation and simply developing my old Wisconsin self through nostalgic reminders. I guess we'll see. 

16 July 2016 (Saturday)

I am really starting to loathe Apple. Once again I am stuck on a plane unable to listen to any music on my iPad because that piece of s**t company refuses to put the physical files on it. No Internet connection, mo music.

Fuck. You. Apple.

Assholes.

Anyway. *grumble grumble* Sitting on a plane back to Seattle and not happy about that either. Stupid woman next to me sat in the wrong seat and now she’s got her stupid sweater spilling into my seat. I ought to drip some mayo on it later just to be annoying.

Yes, I’m not in a good mood. Kind of a rough day. Didn’t sleep very well, woke up at 3 and then had to take two small doses of ambien to get back to sleep. After that I slept until 5:30 though. Went to McD’s, did some laundry, and then hung it up and went to meet the pool people at Taycheedah. Just had coffee. I gassed up the truck and got it washed and then came back home and got everything ready to go. Actually, before that I rode the bike up to the Enterprise at Johnson and 41 which included a somewhat harrowing crossing of 41 over the overpass. They don’t have any sort of sidewalks over it so I had to stay to the side and sneak through the on-ramps and then on a gravel path over the actual overpass. Sheesh. Fortunately, they had a small hatchback, a Nissan Versa, so the bike fit into the back well enough. I’d brought along a bungee cord just in case. THEN I went back home and got everything packed up and ready.

Drove over to see mom one last time. She wasn’t in a great mood. She likes talking to people but mostly mumbles and junk. She did say several things clearly though, like asking if Arno’s funeral was today (he died long ago) but she may have gotten it mixed up with Leroy who died Friday. Or Thursday. Or something.

Before going to the Eden Grill, I had gotten incredibly sad, mainly because of everything but Sydney the cat had kind of set it off. He’s been in a very nice urn in the window since 1992 or so and I brought up the issue of what to do with him once mom goes. I had thought to put him in with them in the Arlington space, but if he doesn’t fit (or they don’t allow it) then what? I had thought Barb would take him — he was her cats initially, after all — but she thought I should take him. But then I thought about perhaps planting a bush or a tree out behind the house and mixing him in with the soil so he could grow as part of the trees. He liked sitting outside under the bushes and a tree very much. That made me incredibly sad. I think I get sadder about that than mom or dad. Mainly because. . . .well, people know what’s going on, they don’t. I would feel okay leaving mom and dad in a space at Arlington, but wouldn’t feel right leaving old Sydney as part of the ground in our old home that we will never visit again. We will have to make that determination with our cremated cats as well, and I’ve suggested either tossing them in the casket with us (at least I plan on a full burial) or thought that whichever one of us went last (me or the Spousal Unit) would, at some point, take them out somewhere pleasant and spread them away. That’s hard for me to contemplate. Like I hate the idea that they would be just. . .gone. . .without anything to mark their passing or that they had ever been here. Ya know?

At any rate, I dropped off some change at the Humane Society and then headed to the airport around 12:30. Mostly uneventful drive although I really didn’t drive as fast as I usually do. Leaving has been tough this time. I don’t know whether it’s because I didn’t have much down time this trip or because mom was not improving or what. I’m honest enough with myself to be fairly certain that had I spent a lovely day with Michele and family yesterday I would have been much more content. And so it goes.

But, really not looking forward to getting back to Seattle.

[Update next morning]

Ended up chatting with the stupid lady next to me and she was okay. I was just in a nasty mood. Got home okay and back to the house. 

Friday, July 15, 2016

15 July 2016 (Friday)

Well, disappointment Friday: No Michele. She bailed due to painting. Was very sad about that.

Instead I went on a stupid 20-mile bike ride. JAYsus.

Anyway. Slept okay. Swim went okay. After Michele canceled this morning I just cleaned the kitchen for the most part. Even did the floor, which was filthy. Was going to do a  little work but none presented itself. Well, I got a Coptic data request which should be interesting. I didn't do much work today. I went to the Home around 9:30, and stayed there until 11:45. Janice was by and so we all visited. Mom had done therapy so she was mumbling a lot. After lunch at Culver's I came home and cleaned the bathroom and then decided to go for a ride. It was rainy this morning and cloudy all day and only 69 so I had to wear a light shirt over everything. I decided to go my old route that I had done every night after work for probably 2-3 summers. I had no idea how long it was; I used to leave around 6 and be back maybe at 7:15? Don't really remember. But it kept seeming longer and longer, but I made it all the way to the top of Cody Road. Was pretty tired then, but then a lot of it was downhill and/or with the wind, so how hard could it be? Sheesh, I was on empty by the time I got back. Totally spent. I even drank most of a beer. I left before 2 and didn't get back until almost 4. Turned out to be just about 20 miles. It didn't even feel good I was so wiped out.

Went to KC Hall for fish with the folks. Then drove to Gille's and had a sundae. Just as I was leaving a bunch of teenaged girls showed up all in booty shorts. Well, you know, volleyball shorts. Was kind of funny. Went to see mom for a few, mostly to turn the Brewer game on for her. She mumbled a lot. Came home.

Sad to leave. I did quite a few things I wanted to do -- sit in a bar, sit on the Terrace, do my old bike ride -- but wished I'd gotten to see Michele more. I really do adore her. Mailed a bunch of stuff back, and am taking the old crucifix for last rites that's been hanging up above the clothes chute upstairs for, like, ever. Probably only moved the last time the wall was painted God knows how many years ago.

I did get very sad, weepy sad, this afternoon. Just everything. It's emotional here even though it doesn't really get to me that often. This may have been the last time I'll get to do some things. Still, I know mom's pretty healthy and I cold keep coming back here for years. But we won't always have the house and that will be sad.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

14 July 2016 (Thursday)

Another busy day. I slept pretty well, although I needed minor assistance getting to sleep initially. Swim was meh. Just had trouble getting going, although I did the last ten laps really well. Worked some at home before going up to the Home. Mom was in PT when I got there so I worked for a bit more (Cascadia and Coptic concurrently) and then I chatted in there for quite a while. Janice showed up so we all had a nice visit. Mom was chatty and pretty clear most of the time.

I left at 11:45 and drove to the Panera to have a salad for lunch. Then I went home and sunned my front on the airing porch. Trying to get rid of, or at least minimize, the farmer tan. And then I worked out in the yard for a while. Pulled more weeds and junk, and gathered up all the old pulled stuff so I could put it in the garbage. Note: Use full leather gloves for thorny things. I even got out the hedge trimmer and trimmed up the bushes. By then it was about 2:30 so I decided to walk up to the post office and mail Jen some stuff she'd saved. I just took the stuff in a bag and then used a box there and used priority mail envelopes as packing material. Ha.

And THEN. . . . . .I sat in a bar! It was the old gay bar on Main.I wanted to sit in a bar while here so I did. The owner was there and we talked about the place. He bought it 4 years ago and completely renovated it. Said it was a wreck. He tried to leave a lot of it the way it was found, so the floor is "original" (however old it was) and it had a neat swastika design (not the Nazi sort). Bar looked old, too, as did the bronze tap. Ceiling was probably the original copper, but painted black. It was nice. I took some pictures. I had two smallish beers in an hour. Felt okay, walked home.

Made a crap dinner of mac and cheese and the remaining vegetables. Then rode up to Gille's and then to the Home. Forgot to get bread earlier so I stopped at the one Pic & Save (negative) so had to go to the one out on the west side. Windy.

At least 73 killed in France again. 'Nother buncha Islamic radicals. Now everybody can change their Facebook profiles to a French theme to show how much they caaaaaaaaare and then go back to ignoring it. 

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

13 July 2016 (Wednesday)

You know, I had a pretty decent day, considering. Slept okay, but did the whole 3 am wakeup business again. I believe I came downstairs after that. Slept until almost 5. Swimming really went quite well considering that I'd drank a bunch of beer and had no real dinner the night before. Being Wednesday it was crowded and I had to share a lane, although it was an end one so it was wider and it was the only somewhat reasonably attractive female in there (not saying much). Did well. Was a bit less energetic than I had been earlier in the week, but I did fine. Chatted with the pool people for a bit.

Came home (rode the bike there and back) and then started to work on Coptic stuff. I have been fixing the ID calculation. Each ID has to have a Site-Program suffix to differentiate the same ID numbers at different sites, so I've been giving them a xxx.11, xxx.21, xxx.31, etc. (.11 = Site 1, Program 1). Had to recode it so I've been debugging all that. Did that until around 8:15 and then went to the Rolling Meadows restaurant to see the pool people and eat some fruit, since from yesterday morning all I had had was four pieces of toast, two bagels, a brat, and some popcorn and pretzels.

Went over to mom's and chatted a bit but then Speech came in and took her away. The PT person came over and said she'd pretty much stopped working again and they'd have to quit it. Oddly, the Oxford comma came into play: Apparently, the relevant law says that a certain amount of money is to be split between "OT, PT and Speech" which assumes they combine PT and Speech as a unit so if they quit PT they have to quit Speech as well. At any rate, they'll be quitting in the next week and OT will start working with her some.

I left at 11:45 and had lunch at Rocky's and then went home. I worked for a bit but then decided that I should ride the bike. So I did that and halfway out decided the clouds looked terribly threatening so I booked it home and was d-a-i-d daid by the time I got here. Rain started pouring about 30 minutes later. I sat out on the porch and watched it. Also started getting my pile o' stuff ready to ship. It was kind of saddening going around deciding what to take. I got some good stuff, I think. I went to the UPS store and Staples and got some boxes and packing popcorn and also stopped at a new wine store on Main St. and got Michele a nice bottle of wine for dinner Friday. Packed up the mantle clock and a few other things and then made dinner. Also did some laundry.

I rode down to the Gille's again and then went to see mom.

Here is the actual conversation with my mom that took place this evening:*
Mom (expressing discomfort): "Owwww."
Me: What's wrong? Does your foot hurt?
Mom: Yes.
Me: Is it your right foot again?
Mom: No, the left one.
Me: Your left foot hurts?
Mom: The foot and the whole leg.
Me: Well, what should we do about that?
Mom: I don't know.
Me: Maybe we should call the nurse and she could do something to help you with it.
Mom: *whine whine*
Me: Here's your nurse call button. You're paying for that thing, you ought to be using it.
Mom: *whine whine*
Me: Maybe you should push the nurse button, can you do that?
Mom: I believe I shall remain noncommittal with regards to your suggestion.**
Me: Okay, I'll press it for you and then the nurse can come in and give you something for your leg, okay?
Mom: Okay.
[wait a couple of minutes while she continues to whine]
[Nurse enters from stage right]
Nurse: What do you need, Carole?
Mom, staring at her and clear as a bell: What do you want?
* Most of which was understandable.
** I may have interpreted that somewhat.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

12 July 2016 (Tuesday)

Whew. Just got back about 20 minutes ago. I went to Madison, although I almost didn't. Had a good time but didn't buy a thing. I got down there around 11:15, and then met Kim-Possible around 12:45 and we went to the Terrace and had a brat and then sat and drank beer all afternoon. Of course, that was just two beers. Waited for Tim to show up. I was surprised she stayed that long (about 4:45) but she did. I think she enjoyed the company since she doesn't really know anyone in Madison.

Anyway, slept well last night and had a great swim again. I came home and worked until about 10 and then left for Madison. Stopped to see mom on the way back and she started to cry a bit but I cut her off and she stopped. Ha.

Don't get to see Michele tomorrow which makes me sad, but I can have more time to work. Should see her Friday. 

Monday, July 11, 2016

11 July 2016 (Monday)

Good day today. I woke up a couple time to the sound of heavy rain last night which was wonderful, although once I did a "hard" wakeup meaning I was very wide awake. That was about 1:30. I took a fragment of an ambien and went blissfully to sleep until 4:30. Man I had a good swim. Was strong right from the get go and didn't even look at the clock until 45 minutes in! Didn't even really get tired. The last few laps I was even breathing every other stroke on the crawl. Really felt great.

I came back and started to work and submitted my alcohol paper once again. I really tried to tailor it to the journal and even spent quite a bit of time on the cover letter. This is probably the best chance of it getting published as a standalone paper. I did that until almost 11, and didn't get a mocha. Doing one last crash diet to look good Wednesday. I drove the car to the Home since. . . .well, I don't know why. I ended up having to take the shoes for mom back and brought back two more to try. Had lunch at the Culver's out on west 23. She liked one pair -- and they fit -- so when I left there, after doing an hour's worth of work, I took those back. Then I drove home and went for a decently hard ride. I went out Martin Road (south) so I could be mostly into the wind at the start and with it on the way back. Well, best laid plans. When it hit 151 I took the Prairie Trail around the south of town and then back north. I was going to come back in on 4th but that turned out to be a big overpass you couldn't get to from the bike trail. So I ended up going all the way to 23/Johnson, which is about where the regular route is. Most of the part along 151 was in the wind but with it so it was easy.

Came back in the usual way, and it was getting kind of rough, although I didn't really feel all that worn out. I think I'm basically in way better shape than when I was younger. Odd, huh? Well, then I didn't work out and drank a lot of beer. Was very sweaty when I got back and decided to have a bit more beer (8 oz again). Took a shower. Then I was beat. Ate a bit of dinner and then rode up to the Gille's and to see mom.

Speaking of whom, when I got there this morning she was sitting out at the nurse's station chatting with them. That was good to see. Still says a lot of odd stuff, just chattering away. Tonight she was talking about Bob (brother, died in 1980). Still dunno what to make of it. Perhaps some of it is that she's just bored and says whatever pops into her head. 

Sunday, July 10, 2016

10 July 2016 (Sunday)

Busy day today. Reasonably productive one, too. Sadly, I awoke at 4:00 but judged a small ambien worth it and I indeed went back to sleep until about 5:10. Went out to McD's for breakfast and then came home and started a laundry and then watched the Formula 1 race and took a short nap. Boring race, the same guy (Hamilton) led the whole thing and no one even got close. At 9 I went to the hardware store and got some more paint -- didn't need it after all, at least for one coat -- and then came back and painted the front and back steps. Turned out to be a lighter, brighter blue than I had thought. Once it dirties up it should be similar to the old stuff though. That took until 11 and then I rode down to see mom. The west looked dark so I checked the radar there and there was rain heading this way! I left at 11:45 and went to lunch at Rocky's and then rode home. . . . .and immediately rode out again for a decently hard ride out to the UW area and did two laps. Took about a little over an hour. 20 minutes after I got home it started to rain. I'd cleaned up all the painting stuff right when I got back.

So, that was around 2:30 and I drove up to the mall to get mom some new shoes, some light Skechers that should do the trick. I stopped at the store and got the nurses some cookies and me a banana. Mom was doing okay when I got there although apparently she'd been doing some crying again. I turned on the Brewer game and she watched that. Was saying some weird stuff again, like was I going to Milwaukee tonight and that the staff there wasn't taking care of her at all. Left around 4:15 and went to the Panda Express and got some chow mein noodles for dinner and took those home.

Well, wait, I did drink some beer after the bike ride. I found an old Pabst bar glass, like one of those 8 oz ones and drank that (Schlitz). Didn't even really feel it all that much, but it was great after the long ride.

So, after eating I walked up to the Gille's and actually had to wait a bit. That was a bit disappointing. And then I went for a looooooong walk. Went from three up to Pioneer road and then all the way over to Theissen and then back. Took about 50 minutes of a brisk walk.

Really want to sleep tonight.

Saturday, July 9, 2016

9 July 2016 (Saturday)

Finally settling down. Was a pretty busy day for the most part. I went and woke up at 4 although I thought it was closer to 4:30. Wasn't too bad though as I slept through the night. I sat on the porch for a while but then watched TV for a while, too. When I finished my second Coke I took a shower and then drove over to the McD's and had a bit of breakfast. Came home, put some laundry in (sheets) and then rode the bike out to the Eden Grill to join the Pool People for breakfast. Nice ride. Bit cool, but much of it was on a trail. One long section was packed gravel and it had greenery on both sides, was very pleasant. I bought a donut from the gas station store. Rode back home and then. . . .I dunno what I did. I went to the Fleet Farm and got some more painting supplies and then came home to continue on the airing porch!

But I didn't. Bought the wrong gloves. The no-drip lid didn't fit. I decided to just pour it out and the wind grabbed it and it dribbled on the concrete. I figured that was all a bad sign. So I quit. Cleaned up and then piddled around a bit. Could NOT figure out what to do for lunch. Finally drove to A&W and got a chili cheese dog which was okay but a complete mess. I took it to go and went to the park and ate. It was windy. I then came home and scraped the front steps in case I could paint soon. Stopped by to see mom for a little while and the siblings called and I left there a little after 3.

And THEN I decided to paint. Wait, at some point I went to the hardware store and got paint and primer for the steps. Probably before I saw mom. So I went home, and started priming the steps. I even drank a beer while doing so. And I almost ran out of primer. Barely made it. I probably need to get more paint since I only got a quart. And I still need to prime and paint the back step, although I may just paint it.

Made dinner and then rode to the Gille's (6th day in a row!) and then rode up to see mom again. I think she may have been crying again but she quite when I got there. Was pretty chatty. Said a few odd things, but not too many. Left around 7 and am now watching the race.

So, good day. 

Friday, July 8, 2016

8 July 2016 (Friday)

Man, busy day. Happily for me Michele came down for an hour or so. So grand to see her for a while.

Slept okay, but OF COURSE I woke up at 3:30. I said f*** it and took a partial ambien and went down to the couch and went back to sleep so today wasn't too bad. Swim went pretty well. Lack of sleep really affects that. I worked on the Ft. Ebey report until around 8:30 and then rode my bike to the SBux over by 41 and Johnson. Wasn't too bad of a ride although I haven't figured out the quickest route yet. I took a travel mug Barb had left and it fit in the little bottle holder perfectly. Messed up the route to the Home as well, because part of Thomas St. is closed. Mom was okay, although she, um, needed to be changed right away. Well, she was sleeping when I got there so I worked some more and then went in right when Janice showed up. Then mom was in some discomfort, etc. We chatted for a little while and then I rode over to the Rocky's for lunch and then home.

Painting was meh. Was very warm and sweaty. Michele texted right when I started so I was kind of hurrying to get done before she showed up. She took a while (was on Oshkosh) so I was actually done with what I was doing, which wasn't much. I was ready to have someone else do it, but looks like I don't have much up this weekend so I may paint for much of it. Anyway, it was joyous to see her. We went to Gille's. Hee!

Met the relatives for fish, we went to St. Peter. Not bad. Some new people were there and they were okay. Oddly, we were the only ones in there the whole time. The bar had some people but no one in the restaurant part.

I walked for a while when I got back. 

Thursday, July 7, 2016

7 July 2016 (Thursday)

So, unfortunately today started at 3:30. Grrrr. Just a thousand different things running through my head. I tried to go back to sleep upstairs on down on the couch but to no avail. Swimming went okay but it was tough starting. I learned not to look at the clock at all. The first time I looked and I had already gone for 30 minutes so that was good. I go for 45 minutes and maybe 3/4 of a mile.

I came home and started doing some work (Coptic) but didn't get too far with it. I left to go to the SBux around 9 and when I got there it had started to rain and instead of going to the Home I decided to come home and watch it rain on the porch. And of course it pretty much quit by the time I got home. So I went to the Home, and didn't get much done. Mom was all grumpy because of her foot but Sara came in and gave her a slug of vicodin and after complaining for 30 minutes that it was taking too long, she calmed down. Left there around 11:45. Some guy from WA called about just getting my voice mail "from a couple days ago" when it was actually from May. Was a guy who cancelled a project and I was seeing if we could refund some of the deposit he'd made.

Had lunch at the Culver's and then hit the hardware store for more paint chips and then a mouse thing. I was going to get poison but then saw a live-catch trap and thought I'd try that. The guy even gave me a bunch of sunflower seeds for free. When I got home I cleaned up the mice poop and litter box crud by the steps and put the trap out. Let's see! I'll check it before I leave for the pool tomorrow and if there's anything in it I'll take it over by the old high school and let it out there.

And then it thunderstormed! Yes! I sat out on the porch and watched it pour down rain and lightning and thunder. How glorious was that. I loved it. Fell asleep for a few minutes, too. Came back in and worked some more on the report for Ft. Ebey and then went to the store and got supper (a TV dinner type thing). Did the usual Gille's thang and then rode up to the Home again. Mom was in a good mood and we tried Skyping with Phyllis but it didn't work, so we called the Spousal Unit instead. She liked that. Rode home.

Was 69 this afternoon after the rain but because of the humidity it didn't feel that cool.

Just want to sleep through the night tonight. 

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

6 July 2016 (Wednesday)

Busy day today. I woke up and heard the thunder last night, probably around midnight. Went right back to sleep, quite blissfuly I might add.. Woke up later and thought, Wow, I think I slept really wall last night except I don't hear any birds chirping. Well, it was 2:15. Took a while to get back to sleep but then was out until almost 5. Had a really good swim although there were a lot of people there. Almost had to share a lane. Didn't take long to get into the groove and I really didn't have to stop at all. Came home, bagel, etc. I worked on Coptic stuff until about 9 and then drove over to the SBux and to the Home. Mom was in therapy (speech) and Liz came by to chat a bit. She thinks some of the weirdness is new (like her telling them I was here to stay). I dunno. I kind of suspect it's part of the rewiring process. They tested for a UTI but it was negative. Stayed there until about 11:40 and then went to Rocky's for lunch, ate too much. I stopped at the grocery store after that and then went home.

I worked on the Ft. Ebey report and discovered that their map was wrong. They marked the route differently from the map so I had to go back to the Google Earth image and try to figure out where we were from there, which is difficult because of the trees, but I had a couple of landmark probes mapped out so the map should be okay. That took until 2. Then I decided to go for a bike ride. Hooo boy. I let at 2:15 and rode to Lakeside Park first and had a cone at the A&W and then rode around the park and then out Winnebago Drive until the cutoff to the UW/MPTC. I rode the loop there twice and then went home, although in something of a circuitous route because I neglected to turn at the right intersection Was very sweaty when I got home, although it didn't really wear me out. I was thinking I was probably in better overall shape now than I was when I was 20, all things considered. I changed my clothes and showered, I was so wet. Piddled around after that. Just made a brat and s few veggies for dinner.

And then rode up to Gille's again, heh. Then up to the Home again. Mom was being a little funny. I mean, funny weird and funny ha ha. Here's a snippet of the last part of our conversation (I was only there about 20 minutes):

Mom: “I suppose you should go now.”

Me: Wait, what? You’re kicking me out so you can watch baseball? Really?”

Mom: “Yes, I’m very tired.”

Me: “Okay, well fine then.”

Mom: “I’ll be home shortly.”

So I came home. There's a nice trail along the river that I can take most of the way. Much nicer than the streets. 

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

5 July 2016 (Tuesday)

No On This Day's because I forgot to bring the diary.

Man, the fireworks were flying last night. The neighbor was really lighting off some big ones. Probably lasted from 9 until after 10. I was watching Captain America and couldn't hear much of it. I went to sleep okay and slept until about 4:30 which was okay considering the time change.

Swim went great. About the first 20 minutes were kinda tough but then I really got into a groove and it felt great. I lasted about 50 minutes and probably did 3/4 of a mile. Then I went in and chatted with the Pool People for a while. Stopped and got bagels and then came home and did a bit of work. I loaded the bike into the back of the Kia and took it back to the rental company, which is on the west frontage road and 23. I was going to walk it all the way but decided the tires were full enough that I could ride it over to the SBux. THEN I walked it over to the Home. Stopped and got it some air.

Mom was in PT and then she just came out for a few minutes before going back in for an ultrasound on her foot which had been swelling up and hurting and was feared there was a clot somewhere; it was negative. Yay.

I rode home and then drove the Equinox to the Culver's out on 23 and then drove it out to Feldner's in St. Cloud. $61 for the repair of the exhaust and a brake check. Drove home, and then went to the hardware store and got painting supplies. When I got home, I was really warm and sweaty. . . .so I took off my shirt and did yard work for an hour in the sun. Heh. Well, gotta get rid of that farmer tan. I started out by just pulling some thistles but ended up picking up fireworks and pulling out more small trees and weeds and ivy. Then I took a shower. Ate dinner and then rode the bike to Gille's. I found that there's a trail from near Gille's (sorta) that goes through town all the way to a couple blocks away from the Home. I rode that and visited with mom for a while. Left her watching the Brewers and stopped at the drug store for soap and junk and rode home.

Nice busy day. Supposedly thunderstorms tonight. 

Monday, July 4, 2016

4 July 2016 (Monday)

No On this day as I am typing this in flight. May have forgotten the diary as well, hmmmm.

I slept well last night, and without assistance. Had some sort of bad dream before waking up and going to the TV room but I don’t remember what it was. Before waking up the last time I had a weird one though. I dreamed that I woke up while swimming in the IMA pool. I was doing okay with maybe 2-3 other people in the lane with me, by which I mean I wasn’t passing anyone, no one was passing me, although I had the rather curious skill of going almost halfway across on my push-off the wall. Anyway, we all had to stop and then some guy started bleeding and was leaving a little (intact) ribbon of blood down the lane which one of the life guards used a net little device to vacuum up.

But that’s not the weird part! Then a female life guard walked across to the middle of the pool and told me — and everyone else — that she had been judging me and that I was definitely in the wrong (i.e., fast) lane and had to go over to one of the slow lanes. Well. I just got out at that point and headed to the showers. And then it got weird again. There were dozens and dozens of high schoolers on some sort of field trip filling up the locker room including a few right in front of my locker. After getting my towel and junk, I headed off to the shower area which was rather enormous, with probably hundreds of shoer heads and I was busily trying to find one that had a decent spray and hot water when I woke up.

That’s a weird recurring dream of mine: the locker room. Often I am trying to find my locker and can’t remember where it was or the whole room is unfamiliar and I don’t know where to go. That whole anxiety thing, although I don’t consciously feel uncomfortable in the locker room very much. Maybe resulting from some form of childhood trauma no doubt. Well, I was a little out of shape unathletic weenie who didn’t like gym class, so maybe that was it. So there you go.

Spousal Unit took me (actually I drove) all the way to the airport instead of just going to the rail station. Got there a little before 7 for a 9:30 flight and the TSA lines were short and the TSA pre-check line was closed but I got “expedited” screening anyway, but that was actually slower. On the other hand, I didn’t have to take off my shoes and just went through the X-ray instead of the nakedidity scanner thingie. I sat around in the big atrium with the windowed wall for an hour or so and Facebooked and read stuff on the web. Flight is only half full so I moved to an empty pair os seats once we were at cruising altitude.

[Update in FdL]
Flight was about 30 min early so we got in at 3. Got the rental car -- a Kia Soul -- and was in FdL by around 4:30. Not a bad car. I like it. I checked the Equinox when I got here and it's just a bolt holding two sections of exhaust pipe together that broke. Should be an easy fix. Hope it makes it up there without falling off though. I went to Culvers for dinner/supper and then had a Gille's sundae, hee! Went to Target to get some supplies and then went to see mom. She looked really good. Was talking pretty clearly. Said some bizarre things, like Phyllis was coming out tomorrow for a week, but mostly okay. I don't know if it's from not thinking straight or thinking okay but it's just coming out wrong. Anyway, she looked pretty good.

Came home and am unpacking and doing various little things. Plan on swimming tomorrow. 

Sunday, July 3, 2016

3 July 2016 (Sunday)

On this day in 1954 (Saturday):
Got up early this morning and went to work as usual. Worked only a half day. After dinner I saw Louise a little while and also talked to her over the phone. Bought myself a used [stad] $2.75 and [round] $.90. Went to the show with [Leis] and her sister tonight at the Capital $.50. Rode the bus home. Got to bed tonight about 2:00 this morning. Spent $4.15.
Weird night last night. Had two weird dreams, neither of which I can remember. I ended up on the floor because the cats were taking up the couch and I felt like the floor anyway. I felt really crappy most of the evening. Dunno why, something was just going through me. Actually slept quite well. I woke up 2-3 times after that and went to sleep unassisted each time. I repeated "Nothingness" to myself to try to, instead of whip my mind into a frenzy as I usually do to try to get through the sort of high-energy phase, maybe clear it completely and think of nothing. Worked this time and the night before, too. So I woke up at 4:30, which wasn't too bad considering I didn't lose much all night. Still felt tired all day though.

Had breakfast in, bland pancakes to take care of my poor guts. Did some minor chores and got my packing started. Still waiting on some t-shirts to put in the bag. Turns out I have TSA pre-Check so I don't have to stand in the long lines tomorrow. The TSA, by the way, is largely useless and stupid, in other words a typical government agency. They do next to nothing except provide security theater. Every time they're tested for weapons they fail 95% of the time. So, useless.

We went to McD's for lunch -- again, bland -- and then did some minor shopping at UVil. Came home, did a couple of things, and then went back to UVil for yogurt. Not a bad day, partly sunny. Mostly pleasant. When we got back I mowed the yard although it didn't really need it, and puttered around some. Fiddled with my guitar some. I'm not taking it with me to Wisconsin, but I packed in a few sheets of trumpet music and plan on playing my old cornet while there for fun. Might not have much time though, I plan on biking a lot.

We went to the thai place on 65th and 24th for dinner and then walked in the old neighborhood. That's a pleasant neighborhood, lots of older bigger houses and mostly nice gardening. Sort of the 65th and 23rd NE area. When we got back I pruned the holly bushes by the north side window back because they were getting out of hand and interfering with the electrical meter reader. Well, and the gas people have to go back there, too. 

Saturday, July 2, 2016

2 July 2016 (Saturday)

On this day in 1954 (Friday):
Got up early this morning and went to work as usual. Sure had a long hard day. After dinner I went swimming at [Louis] pool for a little while. Saw Louise for a little while tonight also. Played the dance at [Tracy] tonight. Rode around with [Elmer] for a little while tonight. Got home about 2:00 this morning. Eats $.70. [drawing] $.40 Spent $1.10. 
Not feeling so hot right about now. Guts. Probably lunch. Well, I drank a bit of my beer before dinner, too. Blehh.

Slept faaaaaabulously last night. We went out for breakfast and it wasn't too good. I got a "Denver" omelette which was green pepper, onion, cheese, and ham. Blehh. Too dry. Too much cheese. I dunno, just blehh. I ate some of it and had some of the Spousal Unit's hash browns. I started downloading my Car Lust posts. The best way seems to be copy-and-pasting them individually into a Word document since just saving the page is really messy and only shows what's visible. Kinda tedious, but I think I'm about halfway?

Also watched some of Dr. No this morning. Got all nostalgic for my childhood again, when everything was much simpler. If you wanted to contact someone halfway around the world you sent a "cable". Every phone was a land line. Files were all paper. I would be writing this in a small booklet by hand.

We went to an estate sale down by the water (lake), meh. Then went to NGate for lunch. More blehh food. Went to a couple of other places and then took the SuBAru to the dealer to have the oil checked. Nothing amiss there. Came home, made dinner. Walked. Felt bad. Blehh.

Kind of a blehh day. 

Friday, July 1, 2016

1 July 2016 (Friday)

On this day in 1954 (Thursday):
Got up early as usual and went to work. Was a cold day today. It rained about 3:00 in the afternoon and I [bend] to [ofciot]. Came home and closed up and went down town and got my eyes tested for some new glasses. Played for the U.S.O. dance tonight. Saw Louise for a little while tonight. Got some eats on the way home. $.50. Spent $.50. 
I looked up the records for that day and it was 61 as a high.

Right now I am feeling very nostalgic and kind of happy. Started late this afternoon for whatever reason. I'm feeling nostalgic for my old grad school days in the late 1980s, I think. I went to the field today and it was a pretty good day, not too warm (although I could have used a few more degrees) and pleasant and the digging was easy and we were done by 11. Only 8 probes. Here I'd been told it was a big 2-day project. All went well. I left the house around 6 and went to McD's for breakfast and it was meh. The sandwich was kinda dry and the iced teat was also kinda meh. Was looking forward to that, too. Oh well. Ride up went fine (Mike went up with me) and the park was quite pleasant. It was at Fort Ebey at the old gun battery 248. We were back at the shop by 12:45. I came home, unpacked stuff, and then drove down to UVil to get some dinner stuff. Sat in the SBux for a bit. Came home and futzed around a bit and then made dinner. Walked. Saw Norma the neighbor and she was doing very well, walking without the walker and had lots of energy. I was glad, she was not looking too great last week (or two weeks ago or whatever).

Part of what set off the nostalgia was listening to an old CD of solo piano by Michael Jones. When I was in my second or third year of grad school I got a lot of that stuff and would sit at home after 9:30 when I got home from the UW and drink whiskey and water and listen to it. Very melancholy. I don't feel bad about those times, necessarily, although in retrospect I was probably in sad shape. But I was young and wallowing in it helped me get through graduate school. I was young and had all the time in the world. I think 24 year old me would approve of 54-year old me, mostly. I'm still in great shape physically -- better than 24-year old me for the most part -- and although my career isn't where I thought it would be, it's not bad. Well, except pay-wise. But I have fun. I did think I would either be single or married to a very girly girl who wore heels and skirts and stuff. That didn't work out.